Sunday, June 7, 2009

Shut My Playboy Mouth

I am fully convinced that there is a radio playing at all times in my wife’s head. Maybe God installed it in her brain. He must have finally realized that people needed to dance and sing more than they do and they wouldn’t do it unless they had music all the time.

This is the only way to explain all the impromptu dance routines accompanied by hums and eventually bursts into full choruses! Well, parts of choruses anyways. I was born before her so this explains the reason why I did not receive the upgrade to “Brain Radio”: apparently God did not start installing it until 1985. Right now the most played song on the “Brain Radio” is Lady GaGa’s “Just Dance”.

Most days when I get home from work I will take a sit down on the couch with my dogs (Phyllis and Talulah) and watch the news. All-of-the sudden out of the other room, “Shut my playboy mouth! Oh Oh Oh Oh. Gunna be ok! Oh Oh Oh Oh. Shut my playboy mouth!” Then the dance routine! Arms and legs going, hips-a-shakin’, hand jivin’, foot shufflin’! Then there is “dance mouth”. The way you hold your mouth while you dance is very important and my wife has got it down: mouth slightly open, tongue pushed into one of the bottom corners of the mouth. The tongue then slowly makes it’s way out into the open and is gently captured by the teeth before it gets too far out there. It is a thing that moves you when you see it. I have no choice but to get up and join in.

It moves through my legs first and they start to shake then it goes straight to my shoulders and they start flailing about much like Iggy Pop’s. Soon I am in full fledged dance mode. The music begins to get louder as we both start singing “Just dance! Gunna be OK! Shut my playboy mouth!” Lights begin to flicker and flash just like a dance club scene from one of those many dance battle movies like “Step up 2: The Streets”

This type of activity usually happens at least a few times a week in our kitchen (which after 2 years we realized that from outside you can see EVERYTHING that goes on in the kitchen). And whether I’m in a bad mood or not this activity will make me forget about whatever is going on and remind me of how good life is and how good dancing and singing is. Sometimes I need to “Shut my playboy mouth” and just dance.


  1. HA! That's great.

    Not so sure if birth year has anything to do with "Brain Radio" though. I was born before BOTH of you and I have "Brain Radio". It's very random. Yesterday, my station somehow got jolted to Lady GaGa's "Poker Face". I screamed, a sure-fire sign I need the channel to change. What played after that? "Crazy" by Patsy Cline. A sign? Hmmm...

  2. Yeah, if Hannah's not around to add her spin on the songs I can't stand Lady GaGa. But Patsy Cline...that's the good kind.